"Happy"? Anniversary...

Anniversaries are typically full of celebrations. But I've also learned they also represent tick marks of another year marking a loss - someone is missing someone. I have close friends that have suffered such great loss and stand in awe how they remain faithful to the BIG God we have. Even though their months and years include great sadness, they also demonstrate joy and praise in the midst of the celebration of others.

So I face my own anniversary - June 24th.

June 24, 2008 was the last time I saw Alex, my oldest son. I stood in the parking lot at his work at the end of the day. He had not returned my phone calls in over 2 weeks. I was confused since the last we spoke he was coming over to help us move on Saturday - but he was a "no show".

Alex stood in the parking lot, in the rain, and simple said that he was not ready to talk and needed a couple of weeks.

Believe it or not...but as my friends say - "That's one powerful Holy Spirit to shut your mouth!" :) - I said nothing more - just "I love you." He walked away and I drove away, thinking we would talk again soon.

In Deuteronomy 1:6 God says "You have stayed long enough at this mountain." I wonder how long I will be at my "mountain". This high-vast-desolate place that is the separation between my oldest son and me. It took the Israelites 40 years!

Deuteronomy 1:30 comforts me - "The Lord you God, who goes before you will Himself fight on your behalf..." Wow - My God is fighting for ME! I visualize - if that is even possible - of the raging spiritual warfare that my God is fighting. The fight that only He can fight.

It's God job to do the fighting - it's my job to trust and get out of the way.

Oh yeah...and be joyfully celebrating and praising Him in the midst of my own "40 years".